Content: The Courteeners - St. Jude
The Courteeners - St. Jude

To attempt a critical dissection of this work would be an insult to you, me, and everyone involved along the way. If you’d like me to discuss the music, tough: there isn’t any. Much more fun to select lines from Liam Fray’s psychopathically mundane lyrics and create a new literary piece with them:

You’re having a shit night…
Because of sixteen pills…
We’re too articulate…
They do my fucking head in…
I’m like a Morrissey with some strings…
Was there a queue at the Post Office?
You’d never ever heard of the La’s…
It’s got fuck all to do with me…
I’d like to stick a syringe in your arm…
Does this mean that I’m not clever?
You get admiration from all the lads…
I loved you, I still do…
You’re not nineteen forever…
Can you play guitar, my boy?
I will stand outside the Travelodge…
Probably tomorrow.

There, now I implore all in coming weeks to respond to the inevitable question:

   “Have you heard that great new band the Courteeners on the radio?”

with the question:

   “No, have you felt my great new knife slicing through your intestines?"

The accompanying press release sums it up better than I ever could:

“The words ‘hotly anticipated’ are much overused in the music industry…”

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